well, i know i sounded all optimistic last night...and i still feel a little bit optimistic but i also feel like curling in to a ball and sobbing for hours.....
i cant give in though,k usually day 1 is the hardest for me, but today has been worse then yesterday, but at least i know it can only get better...the minds all good but now i just have to beat the physical stuff... i got out the shower this morning ... i felt so dizzy; a bit like my head is clamped in a vice... and i said to myself "I CAN BEAT THIS"and felt immediately better..becasue a little voiced backed it up saying "yeah you know what you can"...now im hearing voices oh shit somebody PLEASE commit me!
So that's me... i'm actually glad that there are ciggies all around me... i thought it would be hard resisting... but its not, its almost comforting though and i reckon its taken some of the stress away because i know that if it got bad i could, but i wont but its just the psychological thing that i know they're there.... hmmm crazy!
sometimes i wonder what im doing this for... why do i pay for a coach... why do i try and quit smoking... why dont i want to party but do want to party... is it because i know how good i feel being clean and turn into an unstoppable machine...but when i get like that all i wanna do is loosen up and have fun... SURELY thgeres a balance somewhere people!?! im trying to ignore myslef right now becasue i know my mind will soon start to try and give me reasons to fail and failure is not an option... one day at a time... *deep breath* pheeeeeewwww
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8 comments:
Oh, this giving up smoking stuff is hard work but keep at it - you will be so glad that you did :)
so everyone keeps telling me... when exactly does it get fun???
lol
You can do it Kat! Just take one day at a time and before you know it 1 week will have gone past, then 2, then 3, then a month!!! Then you only have just over 1 month till you are down here! Dont look too far ahead, focus on where you are now, and get through today!!! You are gonna look and feel fantastic once you get past the hurdles you are facing. Keep pushing through!!!!!!!!!
thanks gorgeous... lol u make me feel better :)
Kat its hard work!! I have given up smoking a couple of times now, once I used hypnosis, and once I just went cold turkey and havent had one since (about 7 years ago) stick with it lovey you can do it!! Just believe in yourself!
Positive thoughts will help you through EVERYTHING!!
Hilary xx
youve been without them before for almost 8 days - you CAN get to that point again - just think about how hard it will be if you have to do this all over again - it will never get easier kat - so free yourself NOW!
and yes I had been passing by your blog - keeping an eye on you - just stick with what you have decided! - giving up is not an option - the only thing you are giving up is the NUMBER 1 GUARANTEED HABIT THAT WILL KILL YOU!!!!! X
thanks jane.. good to see you dropping back by... u must just be thrilled that leg warmers have made a comback?!
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